Husband: ?I really miss you.?
Me: ?Thank you.?
My husband travels some for business and it?s become a really great thing. I?m not even going to explain myself because you either get it or you don?t. It seems that this past week been full of signs of independence and maintaining one?s true self throughout your relationship. This doesn?t mean to be this super-strong, no compromise type of person. What it means is not neglecting who you are by taking opportunities to be alone, to thrive without your husband.
I was watching The Bachelorette (recap HERE) and there was a moment when Emily, the Bachelorette, said that she is great with her husband traveling a lot? as long as she?s the one he?s missing when he?s gone. I get that completely. I was also watching The Conversation with Amanda de Cadenet (it?s a great show on Lifetime ? episode HERE) and Olivia Wilde talked about the moment she realized her relationship was over and why that happened. What was the going theme for these to examples and even more that I happened upon was taking ?you? time. Learning how to live life solo, if even for a day. Clearly, I watch a lot of TV.
When my husband is gone, I tend to kick into overdrive. I like to get things in order. So often when the two of us are home, we are rushing around, our schedules conflict, there?s a ton of compromise and you?re always keeping each other updated on what you?re doing and what?s planned next. ?What time will you be home?? ?What?s for dinner?? ?So-and-so is having a get-together.? Should we go?? When the hubs is out of town, I create my own schedule. If it changes, no big deal. I learn new things because I don?t have someone to help me and I pretty much kick ass on the house. This past weekend, I completely gutted our linen closet and pantry. It? now looks like the pictures you see on Pinterest. It?s awesome! Lame example but it makes me happy.
I am, by no means, a relationship expert? but I would encourage you to spend some time with yourself. See what you are capable of. See what your likes and dislikes are. We are all growing. Every day, every month, every year. We change. When you are in a relationship, sometimes compromise includes letting go of your likes and dislikes. Remember to swing on back to those likes and dislikes. Don?t just let them go completely. However, those, too, will change. Who are you? What do you like? What makes you happy? Re-evaluate yourself. It?s actually really fun and invigorating.
I?m feeling recharged. How are you feeling?
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Tags: compromise, independence, relationships, self-help, tawsha connell, the bachelorette, the conversation with amanda de cadenet
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